Grief & Graduation: Honoring Loss While Celebrating Life

Grief & Graduation: Honoring Loss While Celebrating Life

Life doesn’t wait for our schedules. It doesn’t pause for our plans. In the span of a single weekend—May 30 and June 2, 2025—I found myself navigating two of the most powerful emotional currents I’ve ever known: the grief of losing my grandmother, and the joy of celebrating my daughter’s high school graduation.

On Friday, We lost the woman who taught us kindness, prayer, and what it means to love unconditionally. On Monday, I watched my daughter stand tall in gown and cap, ready to step into her future. As if the timing wasn’t already bittersweet, we continued to grieve through the next two weeks—saying our final goodbyes the day after her birthday on June 13 and laying her to rest on June 14. She was just days shy of her 92nd birthday. How do we carry such opposing feelings at once? Here’s what I learned in that bittersweet stretch—and how you can find grace in your own seasons of duality.

The Weight of Goodbye

When Grandma passed on May 30, it felt like the ground had shifted beneath me. She was my “soft place” growing up—the cool hand rubbing my back as a child so that I could fall asleep, the familiar laughter at the dinner table, the gentle prayers whispered at night. The first time back at her house, I moved through the house in a daze, it was a nightmare I was so ready to wake up from: her favorite spot on the couch standing empty, her voice echoing in my head. The craziest part, I could hear her voice singing the hymns at her own funeral. 

  • Grief isn’t linear: One moment, I’m just fine - smiling and hugging everyone, saying she lived a good, long life. The next, I’m crying uncontrollably in the car, missing her smile, her hug, her touch.

  • Memory rituals matter: I find myself repeating Grandma's famous sayings "I've seen your 30 odd years but you've never seen mine", or laughing out loud about all of the good times we had at her house as kids. It keeps her spirit alive in my heart. 

Losing her taught me how tender—and how fierce—our love can be. It reminded me that grief is not a problem to solve but an experience to honor.

The Brightness of Milestones

Just days later, I found myself in a different kind of spotlight: my daughter’s graduation ceremony. Seeing her walk across that stage, I felt all the pride of every reading lesson, science fair, and parent–teacher conference we’d navigated together. In her cap and gown, I saw my own dreams reflected back—dreams my grandmother once encouraged, even when I doubted myself.

  • Joy doesn’t cancel grief: I laughed through tears as she hugged me. My heart was bursting with love—for her, for Grandma, for this moment.

  • Celebration can be an act of healing: In the applause, I felt permission to embrace life again, to let happiness and sorrow coexist.

That day, the diploma she received felt like a shared victory, bridging generations: Grandma’s legacy and my daughter’s future wrapped in the same ribbon of hope.

Four Lessons from This Dual Season

  1. You Can Feel Two Truths at Once
    It’s okay to weep for the past and cheer for the future. Neither emotion negates the other.

  2. Create Intentional Rituals
    Light a candle, play a song, share a prayer—small acts anchor us in love, memory, and gratitude.

  3. Lean on Your Community
    Vulnerability invites connection. Let friends and family hold your hand through tears and triumphs alike.

  4. Extend Yourself Grace
    You might forget to eat between memorial and commencement, or mix up your schedules. That’s human. Treat every misstep as part of your unique story.

Holding Space for Everyone’s Journey

If you’re walking the tightrope between grief and growth—mourning a loved one while chasing a dream—remember these gentle reminders:

  • Speak Your Truth: Tell someone, “I’m grieving, and I’m also proud.”

  • Mark the Moments: Dedicate a photo, a journal entry, or a song to those you’ve lost as you celebrate your wins.

  • Journal for Clarity: Write letters to your loved one and to yourself, tracing your path from heartache to hope.

Affirmation to Carry:
“My heart is big enough for both tears and laughter. I honor every feeling that moves through me.”

You’re Not Alone

Life’s most challenging weekends can become our deepest teachers. As you hold grief and celebration in one embrace, know that this community holds you too.

Together, we honor our losses and celebrate our lives—one heartfelt step at a time. 💛


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